she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
