I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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