What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
