in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
