Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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