Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I think your dad took our porno
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
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