what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
