get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
farters have to be the big spoon...
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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