I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
