im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
ok first of all what the fuck
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
