your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Omg I joined a choir last night...
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
