I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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