let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
