she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
