I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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