Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
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