Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
