Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
