Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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