were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
