I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
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