I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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