Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Randomize
