I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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