I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
