She announced her abortion via fbk
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
