Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
well, you know. whores of a feather.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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