We got so high we made milksteak
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
