5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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