My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
