can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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