No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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