we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Randomize
