I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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