They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
