Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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