I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
