I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
