Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
