He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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