1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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