I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I just gift wrapped bread.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
