What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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