took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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