I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
