dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
