normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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