Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
