you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
