this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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